Screen Time, Real Life and Finding Balance as a Parent

If you’ve ever felt guilty for putting the kids in front of a screen so you can make a brew, reply to a message, or even just sit down for five minutes…you are absolutely not alone.

Screen time is big in the news at the moment, with recent guidance suggesting under 5s should be limited to 1 hour per day (and under 2s having no screen time at all).

According to the BBC, studies cited by the Early Years Screen Advisory Group suggest higher screen time can be associated with delayed language development, emotional and behavioural issues, sleep difficulties and slower development of thinking and understanding.

But I think we need to look at it through a much more realistic and compassionate lens.

The world has changed, and so has parenting.

We aren't raising our children in the same way we grew up. We don't watch the neighbour's kids while we catch up on the washing or cooking.

Most of us don't have that same 'village' any more.

So screen time can be a huge support for us, giving us a few minutes to empty the dishwasher, get tea started, send that message you've been meaning to reply to or let's be honest just take a breath for 5 minutes!

Technology isn't going anywhere.

We're in a completely different era now too. Our children are growing up surrounded by technology - it's part of their world and it's certainly going to be part of their future. Schools use screens, learning resources are digital and even a lot of communication is online (goodbye pen pals!).

So rather than trying to avoid it altogether (which I believe is nearly impossible), why not focus more on how we can make it work in our lives?

Screen time can be regulating

This is a big one for me.

As adults, how many of us (before the days of children at least!) would come home from work and put the telly on to unwind? And how many of us now scroll for a while just to switch off?

It makes complete sense that children would use screens in a similar way. Especially neurodivergent children! Screen time can be calming, predictable and regulating for them (dependant on the content of course). It's not always negative - it can be exactly what they need in the moment.

For me it needs to be about balance. If screens are part of your child's day alongside other activities, including movement, play and connection, then I think that's a healthy place to be.

If you do want to reduce screen time...

If you do feel it's right for you as a family, and it's not just because society is pressuring you to, here are some simple and realistic alternatives you can try:

Arts & crafts

This can be as simple or elaborate as you like, and can include colouring, painting and stickers!

Sensory play

This doesn't have to be messy play if that's not your thing. It can include water play, coloured rice, playdough or different textured toys!

Games

Again, these can be as calm as you like. Card games or board games (Dobble and Top Trumps are favourites in our house), active games (like the floor is lava) or even outdoor games like football can be great fun!

Parent and baby classes

And if you think you need a way to offset those higher risks of delayed language development, emotional and behavioural challenges and sleep difficulties, then classes like baby massage and toddler signing can be so beneficial.

A gentle reminder

You are not failing if your child watches TV or plays video games.

You are parenting in a very different world to the one you grew up in and you're doing the best you can with what you've got.

As long as your child feels loved and supported, and they've got opportunities to play, explore and connect, then you're doing an amazing job.

Everything in moderation ❤️